Thursday 29 April 2010

I made mistakes in drama. I thought drama was when actors cried. But drama is when the audience cries

     Okay, maybe our drama was more comedic and the audience tends to laugh at the various hilarious scenes, but still....

     Well, all I have to say is skipping school to watch the drama competition was TOTALLY worth it! It's really inspiring to know that this people put a lot of effort and sacrifice for only 20 minutes worth of talking and action. And watching Convent perform during that duration of time made me wanna cry cuz it was just SO DAMN GOOD.

    Fine, maybe we did not dethroned La Salle, but 2nd place is not bad. Hey, no regrets rite guys?! U noe I love you people, even though you guys call me a git and a perv. Well, at least I have friends to hiss with and AT now. Jangan kau, my skills have improved. I hissed at the school's pregnant CAT and it ran. I've never felt so satisfied.

     I am so tempted to mock but since I'm a reformed person, and Landy has warned us not to, I shall not do so. Darn, and I had enough material to last me the whole week. Oh well, on a side note, waste your time by reading this poem.

If my love were an ocean,
 there would be no more land.
If my love were a desert,
you would see only sand.
If my love were a star-
late at night, only light.
And if my love could grow wings,
I'd be soaring in flight
 
p/s: Good Lord, mid term exam will be on next friday and I haven't started any studying, mati lar saya kali ini tau, I see a big fat FAIL in my future, Good Lord.
 
p/s: I don't like you nerd, because of ur bad INFLUENCE, I keep on saying Good Lord these days. Good Lord! :p

Thursday 22 April 2010

Today was a Fairytale

     It really was for me. It was the first time in a long time I have felt all the burden (well,almost all) has been lifted from my shoulders. No more competitions to fret about, no more missing classes, no more missing moments in classes, I guess you get the idea.

     So many things had happened that I can't condensed it here to make it bearable for people to read. I'm gonna miss Convent you know. Maybe not the heat, maybe not the lack of space, maybe not the incompetent teachers and maybe not the drama. But I'll definitely miss the students, some teachers, the activities, the spirit, all the experience that has made become a better person.

     I might even miss the school's haters, it amuses me to see just how far they are willing to go to show their dissatisfaction towards us. It amuses me how they think that it affects us when they show how much they hate us, when it only exhibits their immaturity.


    To me, the friendship forged is so much more important than any trophy or certificates or prize money. When I go out there, all I want is to have fun. Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have or could have had. No one waits forever.


    And I absolutely do not believe in hurting others for the sake of competition, because all of this will come and go, but once someone is offended, they'll remember it for a lifetime.

P/S: Does losing your purity ring means your no longer pure??? Whatcha talking about?!  

Monday 5 April 2010

Love can sometimes be magic. But magic can sometimes…just be an illusion.

     I'm basically a surrogate mother right now, since my parents are in KL from today till this Thursday, which they decided to do in like a minute. I never knew my parents were this impulsive.Wana know what's more 'awesome'?

Mum Me
*calls*
I bought you something awesome today, you will totally love it!
OMG OMG OMG, baju kan? Dress, blouse, t-shirt, what?!
No lar. It's an alarm clock!
*cue crickets sounds*
Wat the h---
It's so good ok, multi-functional. Got FM radio and crapcrapcrap. Don't need batteries also, it's like, solar-powered.
Oh WOW, I'm so amazed mum.
You better be, it cost me 150 Ringgit.
Wat!
Yeah lar, I want to make sure you can bangun awal and study. You know kan memory retention better in the morning. So are you studyin?!
Sure, I'm like reading chemistry *padahal doing links on bloggie*
Good, good. I expect my 'INVESTMENT' to be worth it, understand. So, you're not going to disappoint me, RIGHT?!
Have I ever?


Verdict: I'm effin dead. I'll be a disappointment. Figures, when you thought life was just gettin better. I wanna curl up somewhere and just write all day. Too bad, I'm the world's worst writer.

Once upon a time

     My grandfather is a storyteller. For as long as I could remember, Grandpa has been putting me to bed with his magical tales of faraway countries where princesses sing and puffy clouds drift over the castle turrets. I drifted off with them. Never in my life have I ever seen a princess. Nor have I ever seen a real live castle. I always used to ask him how he came up with wonders like these. But he would smile sadly, shake his head, and inform me that in a man's long life, of course, he could have seen many things. I've never known if his stories are even partly true. But in this dark and lonely life, any story would do.


     Every day, I woke up to the same darkness that engulfs me when I am asleep. Sometimes I have trouble telling apart reality from a dream. But then I would hear Grandpa's familiar jolly voice pulling me from my dreams. Other than Grandpa, I know exactly 27 people in my life. I supposed once, there were more, including my mum and dad. But they were here no more.

     
     We live a quiet life, in our dim, underground caves cut in the mountains, traveling through tunnels to our food farm, only ever leaving when the sky outside out potholes turn red, returning before the stars appear. The Sun is our enemy. The stars are our foe. We have long been taught they signify the two things that could easily kill us most—the heat and the cold.


     Each morning I washed up at our well and went to water the few fruit-bearing plants at the entrance of our cave. They lived under a large clear dome, where sunlight reached them but the heat could not. Then I quickly retreated back into the cave. I was taught not to stay out in the harmful sunlight for too long. Then, all day long I helped Grandpa make bread, tend to the 'farm' animals, teach the few other small children in next door caves, or weave fur clothing or. It was enough for us to stay warm, but not enough to protect us from the fluctuating climate of the outside world.


     That evening when the sun descended the sky, I crawled out onto the ledge outside the cave and gazed over the inky black sea surrounding our home. Perhaps Grandpa's castle lay far away over the water on some other island nearby. But it was obvious there was no way of getting to them.


     I had a lonely, isolated life. Times were hard but we always got through them. Never had I thought on our own little island much, much worse was waiting around the corner. It started the day I went to the well as usual. The bucket clanged against the sides as it went down—and struck the bottom with a thud. For a moment I subconsciously continued lowering the rope. Then I stopped in shock and ran to get Grandpa.




     The next few days were rife with chaos. All around people were in panic as they soon realized their wells were running out of water, too. To make things worse, the sky lit up with the promise of another ferocious summer and finding a new water source immediately became everyone's priority.



     
     Grandpa, as the oldest and most experienced of the people became their natural leader and he led young men out on excavations of water sources underground every evening at twilight. However, though all efforts were put into this mission, there was no water to be found except in small cacti atop the mountains rising out over the undrinkable sea water.


     I saw a side of Grandpa I had never seen before. He had always been like a cheerful boy trapped in an old man's body—wrinkles never seemed to exist on his face until the day the well ran dry. Now they came creeping up like the sun chasing shadows over the trees. That was when I knew things were a lot worse than they looked.


     I took it into my own hands to help him no matter how much he refused. Early sunset the next day we trotted over the dry hills that formed our island and scanned the barren land with our dowsers. We'd gone quite far when the dark sky rumbled overhead and the wind started blowing scalding cold in our direction. It was one of those vital dry storms we were always experiencing. The men started yelling at us to hurry back but Grandpa stayed where he was. He was standing stock still, his eyes fixed on the slowly turning stick in his hand.


     It didn't take me long to realize he had found the underground water source we had been looking for so long. But it was also too late to reach him as the sudden gust of wind pushed us off our feet and we were sent tumbling down to hill side in a whirl of dust and sand.


     Grandpa saved our lives that day when he found the water. But after that day he never moved again.
"Grandpa!" I screamed. I scrambled over the dry, hard rocks over to him, my bare hands scratched and bleeding, slipping in my dirty, tattered shoes, my heart hammering inside my chest. I fell down on my hands and knees next to his motionless body. He spoke to me weakly, but with determination as if his life depended on it.


     "My dear child…I have yet to tell you a story I should have told you a long, long ago…"
And it was this day that Grandpa told me a story unlike any he'd ever told me before. Shadows of a distant memory flickered in his once dancing eyes as he spoke.


     "Once upon a time, our home was more green than blue. You could walk for miles and never reach the sea. There were houses. There were fields and flowers. You could walk in the sunlight without fear of being burnt. You could lie back to watch the stars without fear of being frozen.


     There were more than enough people to know. People lived in luxury—and oh, the luxury they lived in. In airplanes, you could fly. In cars, you could travel without even dropping sweat." Grandpa smiled bleakly. "If you could have seen a computer! An amazing invention there ever was. If only we had known what all this luxury would do to us, we would have gladly given up all our needs.


     But that was the way humans were. And luxury doesn't come without a price. That is just what happened, not long before you were born. The crash of water…the overwhelming rebellion of the world taking out on us all at once…sometimes I wish we had never survived.

Your parents died not long ago, fighting back. Now, it's just us. And soon, there might not even be us."

Grandpa's eyelids fluttered closed. "Once upon a time, the world was beautiful…"

I have always thought I was born lonely. Never had I actually ever felt this lonely before. No matter how much time may pass, it was always still coming back to get at me, bit by bit. This is what global warming has done to me.

Sunday 4 April 2010

Drive carefully! Remember, it's not only a car that can be recalled by it's maker

      You know what?! Life is precious. People always seem to forget that though. Sometimes, the true value of life can only be realized when you are a newbie driver driving home from the middle of nowhere in the pouring rain after the weather has been so hot for a few months.

      Yeah, thanks.

      If I get a Ringgit for everytime the car died on me in the middle of the road+ the number of times I nearly hit a pedestrian+the number of times I drove the car so fast over a speed bump you can literally hear the shock absorbers giving way, I would be able to pay for my shopping trip to Singapore in June. Thank God my driving instructor is a healthy person, or else she would have died of a heart attack.

     I feel like a failure now, I wanna crawl under my bed and cry, and it's not because of the driving, only.

    BTW, if you're think about wanting to have a license NOW, be prepared to pay a lot. Not just the fee itself, but also to retake the many test in case you fail. Let's see:

The whole package: RM 2300++
Retake computer test: RM 50
Retake test on the litar: RM 110 (Just for stoppin on bukit, side parking and tiga penjuru driving)
Retake test on the road : RM 110 (if I'm not mistaken)

     Now, I feel major guilty for making my parents pay up for me to learn all this new skills in my SPM year. Swimming is RM 150 per month+ RM 14 per entry to Sutera's swimming pool again. Then filling that stupid scholarship application form made me seem so stupid. Sometimes I wish I am a better child, you know, someone my parents can be proud of. Instead, they're stuck with this loser.

    On an Easter Sunday, when Jesus died and rise again three days later to give humankind the hope for an eternal life, I'm giving up hope. How ironic, huh?